Showing posts with label adrenaline. Show all posts
Showing posts with label adrenaline. Show all posts

Tuesday, April 30, 2013

AFTER THE GUN - III



'the anatomy of a toothache’
By
b2


SMASHWORDS EDITION
PUBLISHED BY:
Bryan Byrd on Smashwords
After the Gun
Copyright © 2013 b2 publishing
Thank you for purchasing this e-book. Although you had the ability to set the price, it remains
the copyrighted property of the author and may not be reproduced, scanned, or distributed for
any commercial or non-commercial use without permission from the author. Quotes used in
reviews are the exception. No alteration of content is allowed. If you enjoyed this book, then
encourage your friends to purchase their own copy. They can afford it.
Your support and respect for the property of this author is appreciated.
This is a work of creative non-fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and
incidents are most likely convenient hallucinations, but also could very well be the products of
the author’s warped imagination. In either case, all information is used in a fictitious manner and
not intended to replace history books, encyclopedias, or one’s individual responsibility to use
their head for more than a hat rack. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual
events could be coincidental, but I doubt it.
**The thoughts, words, and ideas contained in this work have not been homogenized for the
masses. While it is not my intention to be labeled as a writer of ‘Adult Content’, nor do I feel that
anything you are about to read is harmful or profane. However, I do come from a long line of
sailors. The bottom line / bottom line is that if your children are required to use the word bottom
when referring to their backside (as is mandated in my house) then you may want to consider
reading your child a Dr. Seuss book and putting them to bed prior to scrolling to the next page**
This serial anthology gets its root from a sister series, ‘Under the Gun’ which originally appeared
on the blog b2publishing. Both ‘UTG’ and ‘ATG’ are extreme forms of experimental literature
where the content is published immediately after creation. One quick run of spell check is the
only thing between the pontificator’s thoughts and the reader’s mind. There is little editing,
absolutely no safety net, and no lawyers have been harmed in the process (to date). You are
about to read the next installment of ‘ATG’ which will surely spur you to become a follower of
b2, or the member of a support group.
 
 
After the Gun
 
 
 
 
Episode 3
‘the anatomy of a toothache’
‘Look on yonder misty mountain. See the young monk meditating rhododendron forest’
– Donovan Phillips Leitch

Psychosis has its advantages. ‘Normal’ people often go to extreme lengths in order to
 
escape reality, enjoy sublime rushes of adrenaline, and fall into excitement riddled stupors
of mad joy. I get to do it all the time. Drug free.
I stopped taking my prescription weeks ago. Not sure why. Part of me just wanted to
know what I was running from. Sometimes numbing the pain just makes us more numb to
the reality we so deeply crave. ‘Pain is just a feeling’, he always told me. My experience has
been that the absence of pain does not necessarily equate to joy. Rather, feeling sun on a
cheek, even as it slowly radiates the skin; hearing another’s voice, that is incessantly
screaming profanities into your tear strewn face; knowing that all you are hearing is lies,
when all you ever wanted was to show that you care; all of these are overdue, over-rated,
and often replicated.
Things are going to be different this time. I have a plan. My resolve is solid, my
determination strong. I see the path before me, now I just have to make that first step. Make
the plan, work the plan. Make the plan, work the plan. Make the plan, see something shiny,
divert the plant, regret changing the plan, beat myself up and lose sleep because of the plan,
start working the plan again. Make the plan, work the plan. Make the plan, work the
 
plan…………….


(you have just been exposed to a heaping helping of the serial anthology known as ‘After the
Gun’. Do not be alarmed if you feel different after reading this. It is not necessarily the words,
but more that passage of time that inspires us to change, as well as causing extremely long hairs
to begin growing out of our ears. – b2)
I TRULY APPRECIATE YOU MAKING THE TIME TO READ MY WORK. PLEASE TAKE A
MOMENT TO LEAVE A COMMENT AT THE SITE FROM WHICH YOU DOWNLOADED IT.
THIS EPISODE IS CHEEP; SO WHILE YOU MAY HAVE CHOSEN TO THROW ME A FEW
BUCKS, FEEDBACK IS PRICELESS!
WHEN YOU ARE READY TO LEARN OUT MORE ABOUT THE PONTIFICATOR AT
LARGE, OR THE ECLECTIC COLLECTION OF MUSINGS KNOWN AS B2 PUBLISHING, VISIT
OUR WEBPAGE AT:


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(‘dream big, act swiftly…’ – b2)
 
 

Thursday, December 20, 2012

endorphine envy


Life has inadvertently become more complicated than I had intended. 

My mind is constantly awash with anguish and strife rarely pausing to rest or enjoy folly.

Racing from one worry to the next, solving none, stressing on many.

Constant butterflies irritate the stomach and fibrillate the heart.

Shivering cold dominates every waking hour creating an atmosphere of dread and loathing.

Persistent procrastination becomes a safety net with the hopes that logic, motivation, and passionate drive will allow me to overcome this emotional beast that has become my daily state.

I jones for adrenaline and constantly fight the dizzying pains of dopamine withdrawals.

Ideas flood the mind and send a steady flow of drowning doubt that easily overcomes my muse.

In a sea of darkness a tiny light fights to pierce the gloom.

As it slowly grows my newly found anticipation works to follow suit.

When IT arrives, I arrive and am awash in the warmth of pending redemption.

I have finally found the mysterious key, or rather is it the one that has finally found me?

Suddenly I am graced with what seemed impossible only moments before.

My errant thoughts begin to scatter and my mind becomes clear and sharp.

It is then that I realize the true beauty of the light, its motive, and its source.

Cold salty sweat rolls down my cheek, into my lips, and awakens my senses.

For now I am aware, now I can feel, and now I can share the origin of my salvation..............

HOPE.


-b2